Blog: List Friday: What I've been up to lately.

I can't promise that this is going to be interesting. But it is a list of things I've been doing, in case you've wondered:

1. Receiving awesome emails. When I was writing Freefall, even when I was waiting 17 months for it to come out, I didn't really think about fan mail or have any expectation that I would receive such a thing. But it does happen! And it's always so wonderful! The emails I receive--and especially the ones from teens--really make my day. ♥

2. Eating stuffed peppers. Last week, I invented my own recipe for Mexican-inspired stuffed peppers. This week, I invented a recipe for Asian-inspired stuffed peppers!  I still think that Italian-inspired stuffed peppers are my favorite, but it's nice to have options. (I didn't post a picture of my latest creation because it sort of went splat on the counter when I was pulling it out of the baking dish with tongs. Maybe another time.)

3. Trying to win U2 tickets. I wanted to win U2 tickets for my friend Matt's half-birthday. Yesterday, I listened to the radio all day while I was writing and texted "U2" a number of times every hour when they'd play U2 songs. The closest I got was when I was #105. I needed to be #107. Only afterward did I realize that he probably already has tickets to that concert. Still. It would have been nice to win. I tried so hard!

4. Exercising. I'm going to the gym . . . sometimes. And doing a yoga workout video with a friend once a week. We've also invented chat-yoga, which is when you roll out your mats and sit or lie on them. Then you talk for an hour or two instead of doing the workout. Fun! (But such an activity can cause disapproval at times from husbands, it seems. Ha!)

5. Working.  Between my job and Live Through This, the book I'm writing, I'm working long hours without a day off in sight. I'm talking seven days a week, eight to twelve hours a day. It's, um, what's the word? Exhausting. Yes.

6. Writing. This goes along with #5, but it's such a big thing right now, I wanted it to have two mentions. Also, I said this really funny/sad thing to Dwayne right before he fell asleep last night that shows you that writing is kind of making me lose it a little maybe:  "Hey, you should kiss me because I'm writing a kissing scene tomorrow. Um . . . I mean, because we love each other!"

Have a great weekend! I'll be, you know, working. I'll also be taking a couple of hours off to see my husband's band on Saturday night at King Cat Theater in Seattle. It's all-ages, so if you're in the area, come on out! I think Alabaster is going on first, between 8pm and 9pm.

You guys! I invented a recipe!

I cook quite regularly, but I don't generally share recipes because I just use the ones I find online or in my cookbooks. However, today, I invented one!  I think it turned out pretty good. Maybe you will, too. If you're into that sort of thing.  FYI:  It's guaranteed to look more appetizing and photographable if you use any color OTHER than a yellow pepper topped with yellow corn chips. Live and learn, eh?

Vegetarian Mexican-Style Stuffed Bell Peppers
(so-called because of the I spices used, which are not Italian-style like most stuffed peppers that I make)

Heat oven to 400 degrees

You will need: 
3 or 4 medium bell peppers, cut in half lengthwise, seeded and all that jazz, arranged in a baking dish

Filling:
1 1/2 cups of cooked rice. (I used white, but brown is better for your health and all)
1 15 oz. can of diced tomatoes, undrained
1 15 oz. can of black or pinto beans, drained and rinsed
1 8 oz can of corn, undrained
1 teaspoon cumin, or to taste
1/2 teaspoon chili powder, or to taste
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper, or to taste
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder, or to taste
1 or 2 chopped green onions (optional)
1 tablespoon chopped cilantro, or to taste (optional)

Optional toppings:
shredded cheese (I used sharp cheddar)
broken tortilla chips
(Toppings can be added before or partway into baking. I added them before, since my cook time is so short)

Directions:
Mix all the filling ingredients in a bowl.

At this point, I heated the filling in the microwave because I like my bell pepper still crisp when it comes out of the oven.  In order for my filling to get warm enough, I have to heat it before baking. If you like your peppers soft, you can cook it longer in the oven and you probably won't need to heat the filling first.

Spoon the filling into the bell pepper halves.  Add the toppings or set the timer for partway through baking so that you can add them later.

Bake in 400 degree oven for 15-40 minutes. (I always do 15 minutes.)

And that's the stuff!

Blog: My subconscious is often a jerkward*.

Ever since I can remember, my subconscious has done horrible things to me, saddling me with dreams that generally range between unsettling and truly terrifying. The things I see and experience in my awake life can influence my dreams, which can then influence my awake life, etc. It's a crazy, crazy cycle.

Example:  In my Simon & Schuster video interview, I alluded to having been afraid of the dark as an adult. It all started when I decided that since I happened to be in my early twenties at the time, and, therefore, a grownup, it was time for me to watch some horror/suspense movies. It didn't go well. I had nightmares. There were images in my head--some from the movie and some from my dreams--that wouldn't go away. For over a year, I would take a flashlight if I needed to go to the bathroom at night, otherwise, I was sure to run into dead people hanging from the ceiling. I'd run through my office in the early morning to turn on all the lights before those same dead people could get me. And, man, don't even get me started on high school letter jackets, okay?

In the past year, I've come to (slightly) better understand why I'm so affected by my dreams and scary movies and such. This vague understanding doesn't make it any easier, though, when I'm waking up screaming or my husband is shaking me awake to save me from whatever is causing me to whimper and thrash around.

I've started writing a number of different manuscripts over the years, and have observed that the ones I've actually finished (or in one case, will finish because it's contracted) were in some way inspired or aided by a traumatic dream of mine. I don't like to say, "It all came to me from a dream!" because that's just one piece of the puzzle.

I'll probably talk about this a little more next year, but one big reason why I decided to write my next book, Live Through This, is because of a recurring nightmare that has plagued me several times a year for over two decades. And in Freefall, there is a conversation between two characters about what it's like to dream about people after they die, and about how their minds mess with them and make them believe that the people close to them didn't die. Then they have to wake up and discover that the dream was the trick.  I've had a few readers write to me, saying that I've nailed it, that that's exactly what it was like for them after losing someone. And, well, I believe them because that's what it was like for me, too.

Saturday and Sunday nights, my subconscious did something rare and unexpected; it gave me exactly the dreams I needed for some peace. The anxiety and sadness I've had for the past week lifted. And so I say, thanks, subconscious, for finally doing something decent for once!

*I intended this post to have a more jokey feel to it, but everything kept coming out serious. Sigh, sigh!

List Friday: A few things I enjoyed this week.

I'm still sad about my kitty, Oz. It's been rough around these parts, and in the (edited) words of My Chemical Romance, "I'm not o-KOMO4ing-kay."

But blogging about sacks of sad isn't great for anyone, so I've made a list of things that I've enjoyed this week:

1.  100 Shows a Year blog. I know this guy named Jim who is a big-time theater geek in NYC. He sees over 100 performances a year and started a blog this past January cataloging what he sees as he sees it.  I am not a big-time theater geek, but I love reading what he has to say. Truthfully, I'd probably be entertained reading his grocery lists, but since he happens to post about shows, those are what I read instead!  They are often my favorite updates that pop up in my GoogleReader during the week.

2. Planet Fitness.  My trial membership in Aim To Be Fit Boot Camp ended recently.  I really loved going and definitely gained strength and muscle, but I can't afford to continue at this time. Dwayne and I joined Planet Fitness, which is a brand-new gym in our area. It's very affordable. I've gone only one time so far, but I think it's going to be an okay alternative. It's nice to be able to run beside Dwayne for once. He runs up to nine miles an hour, while I'm at about half that right now.  At the track, we run separately, but on treadmills at the gym, we can be together!

3. Damn You, Auto Correct!  This site takes submissions of the hilarious misunderstandings that crop up from typos and the auto correct function on phones. A good portion of the text conversations are (unintentionally) super vulgar, but I read them and laugh and laugh and laugh. I never get tired of them; even some of the ones I've read before continue to amuse me on rereads.

4. Book report for Freefall by PoshDeluxe at Forever Young Adult.  The Forever Young Adult blog is one of my favorite book blogs out there. Their tagline is "for YA readers who are a little less Y and a bit more A," which is totally me!  I find that I have very similar book taste to some of the reviewers, and like them--and many other women my age--I credit Regina Morrow from Sweet Valley High as being reason #1 why I never got into drugs. Anyway, PoshDeluxe a.k.a. Sarah read Freefall, gave it a BFF charm, rated it a seven on the swoonworthy scale, and is going steady with it! I'm really, really happy about all of these things. :-) 

Goodbye to our Silky Jackass Oz Buh-bee.

Our cat, Oz, died today. I'm very sad. I wrote about him.

Dwayne and I moved into this house at the end of January in 2002.  On February 8th of that year, Neko, a pregnant stray who was living at my old office, gave birth to her kittens.  We brought them home and they've lived with us from that day on.

For at least six years now, Oz has had chronic urinary tract issues.  We've known all along the he would never be fully cured. It's an issue of his anatomy not being quite right. We've tried treating him, though, switching to whatever regiment the vet suggested. We've had him on pills, drops, monthly injections, and special food, sometimes all at the same time.  All of this has bought him--and us--more time, and when his insides weren't causing him troubles, he was living a normal, happy, pain-free, kitty-cat life.

But at 9:30 this morning, Oz's symptoms became life threatening, and Dwayne and I had to rush him to the vet.  There, we had to make the decision that we've known for years that we would one day have to make.

We weren't ready for it. 

We cried a lot. We held him. We kissed him. We told him we loved him. We said goodbye. Dwayne couldn't stay in the room for the euthanasia. For some reason, I couldn't not stay.

I've been sobbing off and on since even before we left today. I can't feel guilty for the choice we made because I know it was the right one. I'm just shocked and wrecked because he's gone.

He was such a personality. So strong, so smart, so obnoxious, so destructive, so funny. He was always getting into whatever he wasn't supposed to. He could even open doors. He hid behind the dryer whenever people would come over. Some of Dwayne's band members (who are over here about twice a week) never even saw him. He would "pet" himself by lying on his back and pushing himself across the ground. He would sniff people's socks and stretch his black lips into a hilarious expression that would make us laugh and laugh. His coat was satiny smooth. He would yawn so big it looked like his jaw was about to snap.  He loved to sleep in open suitcases or burrowed under blankets. His nicknames were Buh-bee, Silky, and Jackass. He was Neko's favorite baby. He was a Ravenclaw. He was our Oz Solo and our Little White Paws. Already, we miss having him in our family, very, very much.