So stuck.

I'm still working on the manuscript I started in September. Which was... five months ago. I keep telling myself that there is NOTHING wrong with this pace. I know that people can finish YA first drafts in six weeks if they really want to, but I also know that I am not one of those writers.

I keep thinking and changing things as I go. Right now, I'm in this place where I want to rewrite the beginning, change a major character to a minor one, replace most of her scenes with another character, and change the main antagonist from that other to another entirely.

These are all GOOD things. They are things that are going to make the story better, stronger. But should I be doing this now? Or should I be forcing myself to finish a draft knowing that I want to change these things? I tell myself that I'm saving myself time in the revision by doing it now and I believe myself.

I think.

Writing Goals - 2007

Writing Goals - 2007 1. Finish writing and revising THE FAKE MCCOY. Completion before March 1st will be fantastic, but I'll keep it vague and say I'm aiming for spring.

2. Get agent representation.

3. Get started writing another new YA manuscript or pull out one of my abandoned ones for reworking. Complete a first draft (or at least a good portion of a draft) before December 31, 2007.

4. Attend one writers' conference. (Mostly likely Pacific Northwest Writer's Association Conference in July or the Surrey International Writers' Conference in October. Or maybe the Western Washington SCBWI in April?)

5. Enter the PNWA literary contest before February 20, 2007. (This goal is quite negotiable. I don't want to take time out from my regular writing to work on this. If it happens, it happens. If not, I'm quite okay with it.)

For posterity.

When I come up with new ideas for novels, I like to post it so that I can remember for later. Then I can say, "I first came up with the idea on [whatever] day and finished the draft on [whatever] day." So, I came up with a new idea while I was trying to sleep early, early this morning.

This one is another teenage boy as the protaganist. I really don't know what that's about. I thought writing a boy was going to be a one-time thing, an experiment. (And it still may be, of course. But I have ideas for another boy which is quite unexpected.)

La la la.

Holiday stress

The past week has been crazy with all the Christmas preparation and various obligations I have going on. I don't remember a year being this stressful in the past. Oh, and one of our neighbor's enormous trees fell ON OUR HOUSE two days ago. Love that. So not.

I was pretty set on taking the rest of the year off from writing. But then I came up with an idea to spice up a scene that's been plaguing me. I'm going to get to it and see how I feel after that. I really could use the break, but I'm behind on my goal. Such a dilemma!

Never go back.

A few weeks ago, I was debating whether to make a major change in my current WIP. I felt it was a necessary change, but since I hadn't written it, I didn't know how it was going to play out. My coworker said, "I think you should just try writing it the new way. If you don't like it, you can always change it back to what you had."

I thought about it and said, "Actually, no. I can't. I never go back. I might very well make more major alterations, but I've never taken anything back to what it was before. It's always better after the changes."

She said, "Well, there's your answer."

There it is.

And now I'm debating again. I came up with a new, slightly altered history between two of my characters. If I write it in, it will change the feel of a few of the scenes and put a whole new undercurrent whenever the characters are together. Everything will be deeper, more meaningful, and, in some ways, darker.

Part of me doesn't want to make the change. It takes out some of the "fun" and light in the characters' relationship. Their caustic banter might not be quite so amusing. At the same time, I'm pretty set that this is the right way to go. It's interesting, adds layers, and gives purpose.

I've already made the change in my head; it's probably time to do it in the outline and the draft as well...